Consequence of Passion
by Nicola
Summary: Another heart-wrencher. Keep the tissues on stand-by. Xander hates Angel, but this time he goes overboard.


Consequence of Passion  
By Nicola  
  
Disclaimer: The devil/god (I mean Joss), Fox and the cool monster/alien guy at the end own all except the plot line and the kid near the end.   
Rating: There's no swearing, no sex, and no fighting. This wouldn't even make for 12 in England. *g*  
Spoilers: I don't do spoilers.  
Season: This is season 2/3, K?  
Teaser: I don't like Xander. He is gay. I like Angel. I like Angel + Buffy. I'm good with angst and pointy stakes. Get where this is going? (Don't read if you cry over every little wound Angel gets physically).  
Author's Note: I never paid attention in sex ed. And we didn't go over it a lot so I'm sorry if I get everything totally wrong. Just correct it in your mind. :)  
  
Buffy sighed as she opened her eyes slightly. The room was dark and the windows were curtained. They had to be. She didn't want the vampire next to her to burn up. She rolled over to see if Angel was awake. He wasn't. Buffy smiled as she remembered the passion of the previous night. Climbing carefully out of bed, she decided not to wake her lover. She slipped on her clothes, wrote a note for him, and left for school.  
  
*****  
  
"Where's Buff?" Xander asked Willow for the millionth time. Willow sighed loudly.  
  
"I don't know, Xander," she replied. As a matter of fact she did know She'd told Joyce that Buffy was staying for a study party. In fact, Buffy had spent the night at Angel's doing Lord-knows-what. Willow blushed slightly at the thought. She was aroused from her thoughts by the teacher's voice,  
  
"Ms. Summers. Care to explain why you're 15 minutes late for class?" Buffy looked down and blushed crimson red.  
  
"I was...visiting a sick friend," she stammered. The teacher, who was in a forgiving mood that day, waved for Buffy to sit down. Buffy did so gladly. She plonked herself at the desk next to Willow but in front of Xander.  
  
"Buff," he whispered loudly, "where've you been?"  
  
"I..." she slurred, "had to see Giles. Decrease in vamp activity. Nothing big." Xander smiled.  
  
"Are we Bronzing it tonight?" he asked. Buffy sighed.  
  
"I can't. I'm patrolling with Angel," she replied. Willow immediately warmed to the subject.  
  
"So how was patrolling with Angel last night?" she asked. Buffy smiled widely.  
  
"A total blast. We staked the vamps like we're supposed to and then..." Buffy went on an on about last night's patrol. Xander got really sick of it. He had to do something about it.  
  
"Willow! Buffy!" the teacher yelled. The two girls looked up innocently. "Do you want to share with the whole class what you were talking about?"  
  
"Not really," Buffy replied, smiling inwardly at the thought of telling the entire class about her night. The lesson droned on, but eventually the bell went. It was the only thing that could awake Buffy from dreams about Angel.  
  
The day, like the lesson, rolled along slowly. Xander wasn't there for the last lesson.   
  
"Will, where's Xander?" Buffy asked as they exited the last classroom of the day.  
  
"Probably skipping lesson again," Willow replied without worry.  
  
*****  
  
Angel opened his front door slowly. Buffy wouldn't be there yet so he had no reason to hurry.  
  
"Xander," he said surprised. He was still half-asleep.  
  
"Hey Angel, mind if I come in," Xander said as he walked by Angel. Angel really didn't like Xander but he was Buffy's friend so he would try his best to be civil.  
  
"What can I do for you?" Angel asked.  
  
"Giles needs a book that you might have. It's called 'Rothman's Encyclopaedia of Demons', the first edition." Xander had really done some research into this excuse.   
  
"Sure. I'll just go check if I have it," Angel replied. He sluggishly turned around to walk to his bookshelf. Xander with drew the stake from his jacket and brought it tumbling down into Angel's chest. Angel's head jerked up as he felt the pointy pain of wood through his dead heart. "Buffy," he whispered just as his body exploded into ash. Xander dropped the stake and kicked the dust with his foot.  
  
"That's for Buffy and me," he said triumphantly. He pulled up the chair from Angel's desk and sat down, waiting.  
  
*****  
  
Buffy knocked on the door. It swung open at her touch.  
  
"Angel?" she called quietly. She walked into his apartment and looked around. There was someone in there. Xander stood up and walked out of the shadows, making Buffy jump. "God, Xander. You scared me. Where's Ang..." Buffy looked down at the floor. Just in front of her feet was a pile of ashes and a stake. Her breath caught in her throat as she fell to he knees. "No," she whispered. Then again, louder, "NO!" Her head shot up as she put two and two together.  
  
"I couldn't stand it, Buff. It was always you and Angel, you and Angel. Never you and me. Now WE have a chance to..." Buffy jumped to her feet and screamed at the top of her voice,  
  
"How could you do this to me?! You killed my ONLY love!! I HATE YOU! I could NEVER love you!!!" The tears were streaming down her face as she turned on her heels and ran.  
  
*****  
  
Willow rushed down the stairs to the front door.  
  
"I'm coming," she yelled. She pulled open the front door that was being knocked off its hinges to find Buffy on the other side. Buffy nearly fell into Willow's arms. She cried and cried and cried. What else could Willow do but lead her into the living room and comfort the broken Slayer. Buffy cried for a good hour or so before finally calming down enough to be understood. "Buffy, what's the matter?" Willow asked tentatively. Before Buffy could answer Willow glanced at the clock and cried, "My parents will be back soon! C'mon Buffy, let's go upstairs." Willow led her friend to her room. "Buffy, what's the matter?" Willow repeated when they had both settled on her bed. Buffy sniffed and dried her eyes before answering.  
  
"It's...Ang...Angel," she choked out.  
  
"What about Angel?" Willow continued calmly.  
  
"He's...he's de...dead," Buffy burst into tears again as Willow embraced her, her own tears wetting Buffy's hair.  
  
"Who killed him?" was Willow's next sorrowful question. Buffy quickly calmed as the name of the culprit brought anger to replace the sorrow.  
  
"Xander," Buffy said with a hatred that cannot be denied. Willow's eyes widened in shock.  
  
"No," she whispered. Buffy nodded, the hatred having slipped away and the tears coming again. The girls cried together, drawing strength from each other. They silently wailed throughout the night.  
  
*****  
  
Buffy wiped her eyes before she opened the door to Willow's house. Her mother and her Watcher stared back at her. At first they looked furious, but one glance at Buffy's rumpled hair and red, puffy eyes and they immediately knew something was wrong. She shied away from the sunlight and the two remaining key figures of her life crossed the threshold.   
  
"Buffy, honey. What's wrong?" Joyce asked as she put her arms around her daughter. Buffy shrugged them away, the tears threatening to spill over once again.  
  
"Buffy?" Giles pushed. Before Buffy could say anything Willow appeared at the top of the stairs.  
  
"Mr. Giles. Mrs. Summers," she said simply. Buffy hugged her best friend and then walked up the stairs. Joyce was about to follow when Willow said, "leave her alone. Let her cry."  
  
"What's going on?" Giles asked. Willow glanced at Mrs. Summers who was looking up the stairs, listening to her daughter's sobbing.  
  
"I can't give you the full details, but basically Buffy's boyfriend dumped her and she's not taking it well." Willow gave Giles the look, which told him 'there's more but I can't say it now'.  
  
"Buffy didn't even tell me she had a boyfriend," Joyce commented. Willow shrugged and replied,  
  
"He and Buffy were close but he didn't like very many people. Kept himself to himself sort of thing."  
  
"How close were they?" Joyce asked. Willow looked down at the floor. Joyce didn't get what was preventing Willow from answering. "How close were they?" she repeated.  
  
"We were very close," Buffy answered. Giles and Joyce looked up to the stairs.  
  
"How close?" Joyce demanded in a stronger tone of voice. Buffy covered her face with her hands as she fought back all memories of her lover.  
  
"Will, do you have any aspirin?" Buffy asked. Willow nodded.  
  
"In the cardboard box in the cupboard under the sink," she replied. The two girls walked into the kitchen and the adults followed.  
  
"Buffy why won't you answer me?" Joyce persisted, a little hurt. Buffy swallowed the recommended dose of aspirin before replying,  
  
"Because I have just suffered the greatest lose of my life and all you're worried about is how close I got to my lover! I slept with him, okay? Most of the study dates with Willow were excuses because I was in his bed or out in the cemetery." Joyce and Giles both looked horrified. Willow draped her arm around Buffy's waist.  
  
"We should get to school," she said. Buffy's eyes widened and she shook her head vigorously.  
  
"I can't face him, Will. He destroyed my life! It's hard being in the same state as him, never mind the same school. I just can't look at him," Buffy rushed. Willow put her finger to Buffy's mouth, effectively silencing her.  
  
"You can hurt him if you want. He betrayed us both. I want to see him pay for what he did to us," Willow comforted. Buffy nodded slightly.  
  
"Okay. We go to school," Buffy said in a shaky voice.  
  
"You're not leaving this house, either one of you, until you tell us exactly what is going on," Joyce ordered. Buffy looked at her mom with tired, dead eyes. She wasn't living anymore, she was existing. Willow and Buffy both walked out of the house and the adults followed once again. They walked all the way to school and into the library. At lunchtime they were still there, silent as ever, and Giles and Joyce were also there, asking the questions. The doors swung open and in walked Xander. Willow shot to her feet and stood in front of Buffy, who was staring hard at the floor. The adults observed this reaction carefully.   
  
"What's up, Will?" Xander asked in his usual goofy manner.  
  
"Shut up Xander. I have only one thing to say to you. I...hate...you. You are more evil than anything we've encountered. All these years I've had a crush on a demon. If Angel was a registered citizen I'd take you straight to the police." She turned to look at Buffy who was silently crying. "Buffy." Buffy looked up. "Look at him, just this once, and act on your instincts," Willow advised. Willow stepped out of the way and Buffy looked Xander directly in the eyes. Her anger came forward full force and she charged at Xander, screaming a war cry. Giles was only just in time to step between her and Xander's death.  
  
"Get out of the way Giles," Willow said from the sidelines. Giles looked up, shocked.  
  
"Xander, run." Xander turned on his heels and ran as fast as he could out of the library. "Willow why are you doing this?" he asked. Buffy sniffed as the tears came on. She focused in on Giles.  
  
"Why did you stop me?" she cried, "He killed Angel! I deserve revenge. Why did you get in the way? Why?" she broke into another fit of hysterical sobbing. Giles and Joyce looked to Willow for a better explanation.   
  
"Buffy has been patrolling with Angel but you know what it's like to try and do anything serious with your lover. The same applied to Buffy and Angel. Everyday we'd all get together and Buffy would tell me all about the previous night. Xander has always had a crush on Buffy so I guess he just went nuts and killed Angel to free Buffy up. But Buffy and Angel were soul-locked, I guess is one way to put. Xander has killed a part of Buffy by killing Angel."  
  
"Angel," Buffy whispered. She put her head in her hands and cried and cried. Principal Snyder walked through the doors.  
  
"Students have been reporting a fight," he said as he approached the group. Giles, Joyce and Willow immediately grouped around Buffy. "I'm guessing the reports have something to do with you," he continued, looking at Giles, then Willow, then Buffy. He glanced at Joyce. "Parents aren't supposed to be in school. Why are you here?" he demanded.  
  
"I'm here because my daughter is crying her eyes out," Joyce replied. Buffy stood up and squeezed past Giles and Willow to look Snyder in the face.  
  
"If you're going to expel me, do it now. I have no need for school anyway." With that, she walked out of the library. The others watched her go.  
  
*****  
  
Angel's apartment seemed so empty since his death. Buffy had already swept up his ashes and stuck them in a trinket box her grandmother had given her. The room was dark and dusty, but it brought back a lot of good memories. She laid down on his bed and breathed in deep breaths. The covers smelt distinctively of Angel. She could smell her own scent too, and that brought a smile to her face. She'd given him something before he was brutally murdered.  
  
"Angel," she breathed as she drifted off to sleep.  
  
Buffy slowly walked across the grass to the playground. The sun was shining bright overhead in the clear Californian blue sky. Willow was sitting on the roundabout smiling at her, Joyce was sliding down the slide and Giles was swinging on the swings. Lying on the grass was Angel. He was looking up at her, squinting because of the sunlight.  
  
"Why are you here?" Buffy asked in a flat voice as she stood above him.  
  
"I'm waiting for you," Angel replied. Buffy looked about the place.  
  
"I'm ready to leave my existence?" she queried as her gaze wandered back to Angel. He shook his head.  
  
"I've left my existence, but I can't leave you. I can see you like this, when you sleep."  
  
"Why are they here?" Buffy pointed to her friends and mother.  
  
"You brought them here," Angel replied. The moon suddenly began to eclipse the sun. Angel looked up at it. So did Buffy.  
  
"He's coming to kill you and I can't stop it," she said to Angel. He nodded.  
  
"I know." Buffy continued as the playground turned black,  
  
"What's done is done. I cannot change the past." Angel nodded again. The shadow of the moon first touched Willow. Her mouth opened in a silent scream as the blackness enveloped her. Giles was next, followed by Joyce. Buffy held up her hands to shield herself as the shadow swallowed her. Angel's voice rang in her ear,  
  
"A secret from me lies within you. Care for it as I would for you."  
  
Buffy's eyes opened slowly. The dream was still vivid in her mind as she slowly sat up and got out of Angel's bed. She turned the corner to find her mother, Giles and Willow all sitting on the sofa.  
  
"Morning, honey," Joyce said smiling. Buffy nodded.  
  
"Are you feeling any better?" Giles asked. Buffy shook her head.  
  
"Feel sick," she mumbled as she wriggled into a seat between her mother and Willow. Joyce put her hand to Buffy's forehead.  
  
"You don't have a temperature. Stick your tongue out." Buffy did so. "Your tongue's the right colour. Maybe your just hungry." Buffy immediately brightened at the thought of food.  
  
"I really fancy some chocolate ice cream and mustard," Buffy said to herself. Willow looked at her funny. "What?"  
  
"You want chocolate ice cream and mustard? Yuk!" Willow spoke everyone's thoughts.  
  
"I just thought it'd be a bit different to those four-course meals mom gives me. And besides, I'm not that hungry." Joyce got up and headed for the fridge.  
  
"Whoever owns this place has to have ice cream and mustard," she said as she put her hand on the fridge door.  
  
"Mom no!" Buffy said loudly as she jumped to her feet. Too late, Joyce had already opened the fridge door. She took a peek inside and screamed. Buffy sighed and rubbed her temples. Still with her eyes closed she said, "Giles, I'm too tired to keep up the charade anymore. Can I just tell my mom the truth and be done with it?" Giles sighed also.  
  
"Fine, we'll tell her the truth," he agreed.  
  
"Buffy, you don't look so good," Willow said concerned. Buffy's face had drained of its last bit of colour. She sprinted for the bathroom and the sound of Buffy's stomach lining being thrown up could be heard. Willow raced after her as Joyce came round to her senses.   
  
Willow rubbed Buffy's back as she dry heaved into the toilet bowl.  
  
"Thanks," she sniffed. She sat up and leaned against the wall. "Angel used to rub my back like that. Then he'd massage my shoulders. Then we'd swap around and I'd do him." She sighed.  
  
"Maybe you should see a doctor," Willow said as she wiped the sweat soaked hair from Buffy's face. Buffy shook her head.  
  
"I'll be fine. I've gotta get something to eat, though." The two walked out of the bathroom after flushing the toilet.  
  
*****  
  
"So Angel was a vampire, but he was good, and you two fell in love. Your friend Xander killed Angel, and now you hate Xander. Is that right?" Joyce said for the hundredth time. Buffy nodded.  
  
"That's right mom. Now I need to go talk to Giles. Any more questions just ask Willow. She's been in on it since we moved here." Buffy motioned for Giles to follow her into the kitchen.  
  
"Is there a problem, Buffy?" Giles asked.  
  
"No problem, just...I had a dream last night. And you know what my dreams are like. I just want to know if there's some small chance that the Angel in it was my Angel. Was he talking to me from beyond or what?" Giles looked troubled. He didn't want to break the Slayer more than Xander had done but she would want only the truth.  
  
"I doubt that it was the real Angel, but it could have been. I really don't know." Buffy got it and nodded. "Buffy, Angel will always be inside of you. So in a sense it was the real Angel." Buffy sighed and they left the kitchen.  
  
*****  
  
Buffy walked towards the cemetery wall, dodging gravestones as she did. Angel was leaning against the wall watching her with a smile on his face.  
  
"You're here again," she said, this time with emotion.  
  
"I'm glad you came," Angel replied. Buffy came to a stop just in front of him.  
  
"Are you real?" she asked him. Angel nodded. "Can I touch you?" Angel took her hand in his.  
  
"Only if you want to." Buffy smiled for the first time in a long time and threw herself into his arms. Dark clouds moved across the sky, covering the full glowing moon.  
  
"He's here again," Buffy said sadly. Angel stroked away the hair from her face.  
  
"He's only here again because he's still in here," he pointed to Buffy's mind. "Don't let him haunt you." Buffy nuzzled Angel's hand, a few tears slipping down her cheeks.  
  
"How can I make him go away?" she asked. But Angel had been taken by the darkness.  
  
"Remember the secret inside you?" he whispered.  
  
Buffy's eyes snapped open. Those dreams were really real, terrifyingly real. But it was nice to see Angel again. She wondered what he meant by 'the secret inside of her'. She sat up slowly. For the past week she'd been feeling really sick in the mornings, and craving the strangest things at night. Yesterday, for example, she'd wanted pickles dunked in chocolate spread. She climbed out of her bed, which she'd reluctantly retired to, and immediately ran to the bathroom to throw up. Her mother soon came upstairs to check up on her daughter.  
  
"Buffy?" she called. The toilet flushed and Buffy unlocked the bathroom door. "Are you okay, hon.?" Joyce asked. Buffy nodded and walked into her dark room to get dressed. "Maybe you should see a doctor?" Joyce called after her daughter before going back downstairs.  
  
*****  
  
Buffy left the surgery not quite believing what she'd heard. Both Giles and Angel had told her that vampires couldn't have children, but she had never been unfaithful to Angel. So how could she be pregnant? But it also raised another question. Was this the secret within her that Angel was talking about? And how in hell was her mother going to cope? She headed for the nearest payphone and dialled the library number.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Giles? It's Buffy. Look, I'm at a payphone and I don't have a lot of money so just do me a favour. Call Kendra and tell her to come over and help me out, okay?"  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I'll explain lat..." The phone connection cut. Buffy sighed and put the phone on its receiver. She turned down the street, put her hands in her pocket and headed to Willow's.  
  
"Hey Buffy. What did the doctor say?" Willow said as Buffy came in. Buffy sighed as she sat down in the living room. Willow's parents were in Phoenix with relatives.  
  
"There's no simple way to say this I guess." She took a deep breath, and closed her eyes, "I'm pregnant." Willow's eyes nearly bulged out of her sockets. She squealed as she gave Buffy a friendly hug.  
  
"Congratulations!" she said in Buffy's ear. Buffy hugged Willow lightly back. Willow pulled away. "You aren't happy about this why?" Buffy frowned.  
  
"I'm the Slayer, Will. And this child is Angel's. That automatically puts it on the target list for vampires. I'm not going to live to see this child grow up. And its not going to have a father. And Angel was a vampire. What if some of the demon was passed on? The baby could eat me from the inside out, killing itself in the process. Plus I'm 17 years old with a long criminal record. The government could take the child away from me." Willow looked at her friend sadly.  
  
"You could have an abortion," she suggested quietly. Buffy shook her head.  
  
"I want this baby, I just don't think the rest of the world does." Willow smiled and clutched Buffy's hand.  
  
"The rest of the world owes you its life a thousand times over. Who cares what it thinks. If you want the child, have the child. I'll be here for you. Giles will be here for you, your mom will be here for you. You can't lose." Buffy thought it over, and smiled.  
  
"I'm gonna be counting on you a lot," Buffy said seriously.  
  
"Good," Willow replied.  
  
*****  
  
Buffy walked through the swinging doors to the library. Giles and Willow were sitting at the table, as was her mother. Angel was standing at the front, smiling and waiting. He had a bundle in his arms.  
  
"You found out the secret, then," he said. Buffy nodded and smiled.  
  
"Thank you," she replied. She stood next to him and peered at the baby in his arms. "Is this..."  
  
"Our baby? Yes it is. I won't ever get to hold him for real, but this state is just fine."  
  
"Can I hold him?" Buffy asked. Angel gave the baby to her. He had Buffy's blonde wispy hair and Angel's dark eyes. She rocked the child slightly. "Will our child look like this?" Angel shrugged.  
  
"You're scared, aren't you," he said. Buffy nodded.  
  
"I'm frightened of looking after this baby without you. Willow says I have them all, but they aren't you."  
  
"Sssh. Don't worry about it. I'm here for you and the baby." A dark cloudy mass began to form in the area where Buffy and Giles train. A wisp of the smoke reached down for the baby in Buffy's arms. She turned a little to the side.  
  
"Why don't you fight it?" asked Willow, who had her old long hair for some reason. Buffy turned to her. Their voices were flat and emotionless once again.  
  
"I can't fight the darkness. It comes after the light, regular as clockwork," she replied.  
  
"He isn't the darkness. Give him a name and fight him," Willow said. Buffy nodded and gave the baby to Angel. She took a step forward towards the dark gas. She looked back again.  
  
"I'm afraid." Angel pulled the blanket away from the baby's head and showed Buffy the black mark on its forehead.  
  
"The baby will be marked if you do not conquer your fear," he said. Buffy turned back to face the darkness.  
  
"The darkness isn't you. You are the one who hurt me. You are ..." The mass screamed to drown out the name and blew a wind to blow the words from her mouth. "Xander!" she screamed. The mass roared as it dissipated into thin air. Buffy turned round to face the others. "Is it over?" she asked.  
  
"It's over. Now you must fight the real world," Giles replied.  
  
Buffy, Willow, Giles and Joyce were all waiting at the airport for Kendra to arrive. It had been a month since Giles had phoned Kendra in Jamaica but she had finally arrived.  
  
"Buffy! Mr. Giles! Hello!" she greeted as she walked into the waiting lounge. The four assembled all stood up.  
  
"Hello Kendra," Giles replied, "And how are you?" Kendra smiled.  
  
"Fine, thank you. The flight was good. And you?" she replied.  
  
"We're all good," Buffy said. Kendra turned to her fellow freak.  
  
"That is good." She looked at Buffy's slightly rounded stomach. "Not training so hard?" she teased. Buffy smiled a little.  
  
"No, this is the reason you're here," Buffy replied. Kendra frowned. Buffy sighed, "I'm pregnant. And a pregnant Slayer is a tasty Slayer, so..." Kendra had stopped walking.  
  
"Do I say congratulations?" she asked. Buffy shrugged.  
  
"Depends on how you look at it. Slayers in Sunnydale don't get it easy. I can keep slaying for another two or three months but after that you're on your own." Kendra nodded and continued walking.  
  
"Who is the father?" she asked. Buffy remained silent and kept her eyes to the floor. Kendra looked to the others who didn't answer. Buffy sighed heavily again.  
  
"Angel's the father." Kendra did her best to hide her shock. There was silence all the way to Buffy's house.  
  
"You can have my room," Buffy said to Kendra.   
  
"Where will you sleep?" Kendra asked.  
  
"Angel's place. He doesn't...Angel's dead. Xander killed him. Y'know, the guy you went all funny around. So I'm just coping on my own. Uh, if you need anything my mom's just down the hall. Yell and she'll come running. And I'll see you tomorrow." With that, Buffy walked down the street.  
  
*****  
  
Eight months passed slowly for Buffy. The baby she carried didn't cause any problems itself. It was always healthy and normal. Kendra had a little bit of trouble with Spike and Dru when they caused trouble but Buffy was always there as back up. They managed to kick the couple out of the country. There was only one more month left. Or was there?  
  
"Mom?"  
  
"Yes honey?"  
  
"I have a problem."  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"My water just broke!"  
  
Joyce slammed the phone back into its receiver and raced for what was now Buffy's apartment. Her daughter was giving birth to a vampire's child a month too soon. She was too worried to be surprised. After running through many stop signs and racing down the streets at over 50mph, she finally arrived at Buffy's. In fact she made it five minutes quicker than usual but it seemed like it took an eternity. Buffy was out of the door as quick as she could waddle.   
  
Kendra, Willow and Giles met up with Buffy and Joyce at the hospital. Buffy was doing her breathing like she was supposed to. The nurses took the wheelchair containing Buffy from Joyce and wheeled her into the elevator that would take her to the delivery room. The others took the stairs.  
  
Buffy climbed into the bed at the nurse's instruction. She was offered painkillers but she declined. Joyce came in for moral support but Buffy told her to get out   
  
"Come on, girl," the nurse encouraged. She was a big, black, friendly woman. She offered Buffy her hand to squeeze but Buffy shook her head, knowing full well that she would break a few bones. Instead she gripped the metal rails that lined the bed. Then came the contractions. She leaned forward and pushed with all her might like the nurse said. "Good girl," she comforted, rubbing Buffy's back.   
  
"And again," said the doctor. So Buffy repeated her actions.   
  
"Aaaaaaaaagh!" she yelled. Then she relaxed again. Then the contraction came again. And again.  
  
"That a girl. C'mon. Push. Breathe. Push! Breathe," the nurse said. The doctor glanced at the clock on the wall, and then at the blood that was collecting round Buffy's legs. She hadn't been in labour long but already there was way too much blood. He motioned for the nurse to have a look.  
  
"She should be dead by now," the doctor whispered in the nurse's ear. Buffy screamed as she pushed again. She gripped the metal railings so hard they snapped, amazing all that were in the room.   
  
"Angel," she whispered, drawing strength from the name.  
  
"C'mon girl. You can do it!" the nurse encouraged. Buffy pushed again.  
  
"I can see its head!" exclaimed the doctor.   
  
"C'mon, honey. Just one more push!" Buffy pushed. She had the snapped metal in her hands so tight it was bending them. "And again!" Buffy yelled as she pushed just one more time. The cries of a baby filled the room as Buffy fell back against the pillows with a sigh of relief. The nurse quickly dabbed the blood from the baby's body and wrapped it up in some blankets before handing it to Buffy. "Congratulations, honey. It's a boy." Buffy cradled the child in her arms, a few tears slipping down her face. The baby wasn't crying anymore.  
  
"Hiya," Buffy whispered. He wriggled a little. The boy had very fair hair. The nurse covered Buffy up with a towel. Buffy looked up at the window where Willow and Joyce were looking in. Buffy smiled and nodded for them all to enter. They did so. The nurses and doctor left the room with smiles on their faces. Willow and Joyce stood at the sides of the bed.  
  
"I guess it hurt," Willow said, pointing at the gaps in the railing. Buffy's smile broadened.  
  
"Congratulations," Giles said.  
  
"Have you..." Joyce was interrupted as the door was pushed open and another person walked. He had dark hair and he wore the funniest of clothes. No one cracked a smile though.  
  
"What are you doing here, Xander," Buffy hissed. He looked up guiltily.  
  
"I...just wanted to say congratulations. And to see what the baby looks like," he replied. Buffy nodded a little.  
  
"Come here, Xander," she said, keeping her voice clear of emotion. Xander walked over to the bed. "Lean down." This he also did. He looked at the baby. He could clearly see it was Buffy and Angel's child. Buffy whispered in his ear, "This is my baby. Because of you he's going to grow up without a father. Because of that," she spoke slowly, clearly and quietly, but with all the hatred she now had for him, "I hate you." Xander slowly backed away. "You leave me, my baby, and the rest of us alone. Do you understand?" Xander opened and closed his mouth aimlessly.  
  
"Can't you even try to forgive me?" Buffy shook her head.  
  
"Not ever. Now go!" Xander hung his head and slowly walked out of the door. When he was gone the atmosphere of the room immediately brightened.  
  
"Have you thought of a name?" Joyce asked. Buffy shook her head.  
  
"I'm gonna wait a while. Personal reasons." Buffy was sure Angel from her dreams would want to name him.   
  
"I should imagine you're rather tired now. I think we should let you rest," Giles said. Buffy nodded and everyone got up to leave. The black nurse came in a second later to move Buffy to a different bed.  
  
"You put on quite a show, girl. Doctor thought you should be dead with all the blood loss. And look what you have done to our bed! Dear me! I am glad you weren't squeezing my hand." Buffy grinned as she swung her legs out of bed and stood up. The nurse looked at her amazed.  
  
"I'm not that affected by blood loss," Buffy said lamely. The nurse took the boy off of Buffy anyway, just in case. They walked to a large ward full of mothers and their children. Buffy gladly let the nurse stay with her son while she went for a really quick shower. She was back within ten minutes. She climbed into the bed, kissed her son good night, and drifted off to sleep.  
  
Buffy was walking into the large ward that was lined with beds, but it was empty apart from hers. Angel was sitting on it, looking at their son. Buffy pulled on the hospital night shirt she had on. It was way too short. She sat on the bed next to Angel and watched him as he caressed his son's cheek.  
  
"I'm proud of you," he said to Buffy. Buffy leaned her head on his shoulder.  
  
"He needs you," she replied.  
  
"But I'm gone. I can only see him through you," he told her. Buffy sighed. Angel put his arm around her shoulders and kissed her head.  
  
"I love you," Buffy said. Angel smiled slightly.  
  
"I love you too. I love both of you."  
  
"What do you want to call him?" Buffy asked, looking up at Angel.  
  
"It's a tie between Caleb and James," Angel admitted. Buffy thought about the two names.  
  
"Caleb," she chose eventually. Angel nodded.  
  
"Caleb," he repeated, "I like it."  
  
"I have to go now," Buffy told him as she stood up. Angel tugged at her arm slightly.  
  
"You can't leave yet," he pleaded.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I want a kiss," he said. Buffy smiled and leaned down to meld her mouth with his. The kiss was gentle and uncertain at first, but their old fire soon returned, passionate as ever. The kiss grew deeper and deeper, until a voice called out for Buffy. She pulled back and looked into Angel's eyes.  
  
"You be here, and I'll be back," she said. She kissed his nose before backing up. A white light entered the room.  
  
"Buffy," the nurse said again. Buffy slowly opened her eyes to the bright light of the ward.  
  
"Hmmm?" she mumbled.  
  
"So you're awake now. Took long enough," the nurse commented.  
  
"It was a good dream," Buffy sighed. The nurse chuckled.  
  
"I'm sorry to wake you, honey, but I really need to fill in the birth certificate. And I can't do that without you." Buffy blinked slowly.  
  
"Okay. Fire away," Buffy said.  
  
"Good." The nurse looked Buffy over. "How old are you, hon.?"   
  
"Seventeen," Buffy replied. The nurse tut-tutted.  
  
"That's a bit young to be a mother. And single I take it."  
  
"The father of the baby was murdered the day after he was conceived," Buffy said confidently but sadly. The nurse immediately softened up.  
  
"I am so sorry," she said sincerely. Buffy shrugged.  
  
"Is that all you wanted to know?" she asked. The nurse shook her head.  
  
"What are you going to call the baby?" Buffy thought about her dream and licked her lips remembering Angel's unique taste.  
  
"His daddy wanted to call him Caleb," she said eventually. The nurse wrote that down.  
  
"Is he going to have a middle name?" the nurse continued. Buffy had already drifted off to sleep again. "Buffy!"  
  
"Huh?" Buffy woke up sharply.  
  
"A middle name?" the nurse asked.  
  
"Angel," Buffy said without hesitation.   
  
"Angel it is then. Why d'you pick that?" she asked. Buffy looked down at her hands as she replied,  
  
"His daddy was called Angel." The nurse felt only pure sympathy for the girl.  
  
"You really loved him didn't you," she said. Buffy looked up at the kind face of the nurse.  
  
"I still do." The nurse smiled.  
  
"I better leave you to get some rest." Buffy smiled up at her. The nurse walked away. Buffy looked at the baby boy lying beside the bed. He was so small, but apparently the perfect size for birth even though he was a month early. His blonde hair was perfect and he was as silent as a library. Buffy slowly stroked his soft hair.  
  
"Caleb," she said to herself, "Caleb Angel Summers." She smiled and drifted back into a reality where she, Angel and Caleb were a family.  
  
  
The End!  



End file.
